Computer Science Jokes

Why was the computer cold?
Because it left its Windows open.

Why do Java developers wear glasses?
Because they can't C#!

Why didn't the programmer write any code all day?
They spent all day trying to exit out of Vim!

Why did the programmer quit his job?
He didn't get arrays!

I have a joke about recursion, but I have a joke about recursion, but I have a joke about recursion, but I have a joke about recursion, but I have a joke about recursion, but I have a joke about recursion, but I have a joke about recursion, but I …

["hip","hip"]
hip hip array!

There are 10 types of people: those who understand binary, and those who don’t.

An SQL query goes into a bar, walks up to two tables and asks, “Can I join you?”

What do you get if you cross a computer with an elephant?
Lots of memory

How did the first program die?
It was executed.

How does a computer scientist organise their bath toys?
Bubblesort

I could tell you a joke about UDP...but I don't know if you'd get it

Why did the developer go broke?
Because they used up all their cache.

Why didn't the database admin socialise with their colleagues?
They couldn't figure out how to JOIN in

What’s the object-oriented way to become wealthy?
Inheritance.

What do you get when you cross the Java runtime with a venue after a party?
A garbage collection.